Love Song – Ardin Patterson

Since it’s my birthday this month, I’ve got a lot of music scheduled to release. Most of these are songs that were written either last year, or during the middle of the pandemic.

Love Song is the newest track coming out after my cover of Edge of Seventeen, and T-Rex in a Toddlers Body. The songs releasing later this month are titled The Last Song (March 23rd), and Loneliness (March 26th). I will also be releasing an EP on March 26th, titled Songs from Vermin which features 5 songs from the novel series along with a bonus alternative version of one of the songs.

The Last Song and Loneliness, are both songs written based off and set in the world of my nieces dolls. Although they might not sound like it. I’d like to post a lyric video for each of them, and am hoping to have one ready to release for the same week of their release, but we’ll see. I just finished recording for a series, and have some other projects on the go here, so hopefully I can get something put together.

Loneliness is the most upbeat out of the tracks. I had a lot of fun recording that one. Hopefully you’ll like it! I get that one stuck in my head a lot.

Looking for more music? check out these songs.

Songs from Vermin

As promised, yesterday the EP Songs from Vermin released onto streaming platforms, along with the single Loneliness. I had so much fun recording all of…

Edge of Seventeen

I recorded this way back and finally decided to release it since it’s my birthday month. I actually recorded two versions of this song, one…

Read More about Vermin

My First Book Signing

I finally did my first book signing this past weekend, and it was so much fun. Releasing a novel during the pandemic was weird. I’m…

Writing Updates

I’ve been writing the third book in the Vermin series by hand, which has honestly been cathartic. I don’t know why I stopped drafting novels…

Apples and Worms

Apples & Worms

Ardin Patterson, Sept. 1st, 2020.

I once cut my arm

Just so I could breath

Cause my lungs were filled right up

With something heavy

And it made me sick

I thought I might throw up

I didn’t but I wish I had

I didn’t but I wish I never lied

I didn’t but I wish I had

I didn’t but I wish I wouldn’t smile.

Dodo, dododo, laladi, dada (x2)

I wrote it in my own blood

The letters of my name

Cause my reflection was all screwed up

I didn’t look the same.

Inside me rose a panic

It fluttered, it crept in deep.

Dug a hole inside my body

Where my heart used to beat.

Dodo, dododo, laladi, dada (x2)

Let me out

Hear me crying

On the bedroom floor

Little fears have eaten me alive

From the inside

Like an apple devoured by worms.

Here I am broken

Needing someone to hold me up

But I chased them

With fire

Said I had it all figured out.

Dodo, dododo, laladi, dada (x2)

More Music

Quick Update

It’s officially December, which means that NaNoWriMo22 has come to an end. I still have a lot to do for this novel, however it’s been…

The Chain

The Chain is now available to listen to on streaming platforms such as Spotify, Apple Music and Deezer! Thanks for listening. You can also listen…

Under Birch Trees


Within this swamp land

The mist it hovers

It creates circles

Around your brothers

It lingers softly

Beneath your feet

It looms and it hovers

Along it creeps

Circling, circling


It’s lingering

Circling, circling


It’s lingering

(Ah, it draws you near/Within this atmosphere you feel no fear)

Smoke hangs in the air

And draws you near

Within this atmosphere

You feel

No fear

Under birch trees

And foggy skies

You forget that

We all die

Under birch trees (Circling, circling. Lingering, it’s lingering)

The air is clear (Circling, circling. Lingering, it’s lingering)

Except the mist that hangs (Circling, circling. Lingering, it’s lingering)

It’s always here

It’s always here

It’s always here

I wrote this song while thinking about the swamp my friends and I used to hang out in as teenagers. I’d get so many mosquito bites, but there was something pretty about all birch trees, trilliums and the mist on the water that always sparked our imagination.

This song is dedicated to them.

I Lost My Head – New Single

As promised, I’ve released new music. I tend to sit on songs for months (sometimes longer) before releasing them.

Along with I Lost My Head, are two other tracks, Under Birch Trees and Apples and Worms.


I lost my head

At the party

When you kissed her

And not me

I lost my mind

When I saw you hold her

You pulled her in closely

Why can’t I just accept that

You’ll never love me

You’ll never look at me

Not like that

Why Can’t I accept that

We were never meant to be

You are not my happy ever ending

I thought you cared

I thought you knew

I thought you understood me

Because you noticed

When no one else did

That my spirit was crumbling

And I was losing sight of me

I punched a wall until my knuckles went number

I felt so dumb

Thinking you wanted someone like me

I let my heart

Get devoured

By my false insecurities

My insecurities

I lost my head

At the party

When I saw you kiss her

And not me

I lost my mind

When I saw you hold her

You pulled her in


Why can’t I just accept that

You’ll never love me

You’ll never look at me

Not like that

Why can’t I accept that?

You and Me


I know you and me
Could be
More than two
I know you and me
Could be
I don't want to say goodbye
To you
I know you and me 
Could be

Ah (Could be)

I know you and I
Could be 
More than two
I know you and I
Could be (be, be)
I just want to be 
With you
I know you and I
Should be

I know you and I
Could be 
More than two
And I think you and I
Would make a good team
I don't want to say goodbye
To you
I want us 
To be
Don't you want to
Stay with me?

Ah, ah, ah (You and me)

You and Me

I think you and me
Should be
More than two

I wrote this song back in university. It’s one of those songs that I never wrote the lyrics out for, and recorded on my phone while alone in my room. I rerecorded it in my studio after it was built, and although I intended to release it when I released Heart and Juliet, I waited.

I initially wrote this song about someone I had been close to, while we were drifting apart. Maybe one of these days I’ll share the original rough version of the song that I recorded with my phone, although the lyrics are different and much sadder, whereas this version is a little more hopeful.

Recording Some Music

I’ve been trying to pre-plan out some posts for the coming week but I’ve been busy. Between recordings, prepping for Vermin’s release date, work, writing and life, I’ve begun to realize I’m a fairly efficient and flexible human being when I buckle down and apply myself.

I re-recorded a song I covered a few years back yesterday after being requested to share it. The old one was recorded in my room with my other mic, which struggles to pick up my louder/higher vocals, so I thought an update was in order. I had fun redoing the song and I’m going to be posting it sometime today on YouTube. I’ll be leaving the original up as well, just because I like to compare older versions of tracks I’ve recorded…it’s kind of like comparing the first draft of a book to the final version.

I don’t post all of my covers on Spotify, but I do have a few on there like White Rabbit, Gothic Pink and Then I Woke Up.

Out of my recent covers on Spotify, I would say I really enjoyed recording White Rabbit. I had a lot of fun with it and experimented a lot vocally. My voice sounds deeper in this compared to when I sing normally, which might be why I listen to it most often.

I’m planning up uploading some new music around August 1st, which is the release date for Vermin, but I’ve been having some trouble deciding on which instrument to play or if I want to challenge myself and play both guitar and piano…which I’ve never done on a track before. I just think for certain songs, it’ll sound really nice. Some of these songs I wrote for a male vocalist, and I don’t have one on hand at the moment to record with me, so I’ll be performing those myself. Perhaps I’ll be able to collaborate with someone on a track in the future, butf for now I’m recording these songs for fun, and thought it would be cool to share them with people while they’re reading Vermin.

I love incorporating music into my stories, and sometimes like to include stories within stories as well. I’ve had the opportunity to do both with The Vermin Series and it makes me so happy because two of my loves can co-exist together in my fictional world.

🌼 White Rabbit 🌼 – Jefferson’s Airplane Cover


One pill makes you larger
And one pill makes you small,
And the ones that mother gives you
Don't do anything at all.
Go ask Alice
When she's ten feet tall.
And if you go chasing rabbits
And you know you're going to fall,
Tell 'em a hookah smoking caterpillar
Has given you the call.
Call Alice
When she was just small.
When the men on the chessboard
Get up and tell you where to go
And you've just had some kind of mushroom
And your mind is moving low.
Go ask Alice
I think she'll know.
When logic and proportion
Have fallen sloppy dead,
And the White Knight is talking backwards
And the Red Queen's "off with her head!"
Remember what the dormouse said:
"Feed your head. Feed your head. Feed your head"

Heart is Now Available

Heart is available to listen to on Youtube and Instagram! The artwork for this project was created by my lovely sister @nuggiedraws. You can find her on Instagram!

There are three songs in total: Heart, Artist and Juliet’s Song.

I wrote Heart and Juliet’s Song back when I was in the 10th Grade.

I wrote Juliet’s Song for an animated project I made for my English class at the time. Initially it was played on the piano and yes, it is based on the play Romeo and Juliet. I re-recorded and used the song again in university for one of my Shakespeare course finals…and then decided to return to it again to create an acoustic version on the guitar.

Heart, the title track I wrote the same year. If I’m being honest, it isn’t the most emo song I’ve ever written. It’s pretty sad though. It was one of the first songs I wrote with my guitar. The song kept resurfacing over the years at different points in my life. At times I wish the song were longer, but at the same time I don’t think it needs to be. It always just felt right. It’s definitely the most personal song I’ve released. I actually shared the song when I entered the Zepeto Idol competition on Instagram a while back.

Artist I wrote initially as a poem this year and ended up putting music to it on a whim. I actually wrote the song while procrastinating a chapter edit for my debut. Whenever I get stuck on a scene, I try writing something else, like a poem to inspire me. In this case it worked but then I ended up with this recording hanging out on my laptop…and then, I decided that for once I’d actually share the music I’d written versus a cover song.

I hope you enjoy listening to Heart and that you’ll check out @nuggiedraws (I have her gif on my blogs homepage! Cute right?)